Friday, November 17, 2006

Morbid Misanthrope's Drunken Safety Tip for the Weekend

You can't fall in the shower if you wash yourself in the sink.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

yeah but then you get a charley horse.

morbid misanthrope said...

just thinking -- Is that some kind of rash brought on by taking the ol' "hooker shower"?

Cherry! said...

Wise words. I guess if I had have read this post before last night I wouldn't have ended up in this damn neck brace....

badgerbob said...

Yes, but there is always a chance that you may pass out, fall, and kill yourself by cracking your head on the toilet.

NewYorkMoments said...

This is genius! Too bad you didn't tell me about this years ago! But, just in case you don't happen to have a sink, you can't fall in the shower if you just don't wash at all!

badgerbob said...

Yes Nym, and think of all the new friends you could have, who populate the alleys of the Big Apple.

morbid misanthrope said...

cherry! -- Severe neck trauma gives you a reason to drink all day, and no one can say a damn thing about it. If they do they're racist. I wish my neck were broken....

badgerbob -- I've busted my head on the toilet one too many times. My dentist is a fucking liar; my teeth still haven't grown back.

newyorkmoments -- You caught me. The only reason people on the internet don't hate me is because they can't smell me. I haven't taken a shower since David Hasselhoff broke down the Berlin wall with his voice.

badgerbob & lou -- Zing!

honkeie said...

nor can you bust your ass if you wash up in the toilet. Well, after you flush.....those blue toilet mints do help settle the tummy.

Cherry! said...

you're so right! From this day forward that will be why I'm eternally intoxicated!

morbid misanthrope said...

cherry! -- I wish I could be drunk all the time. Unfortunately, my parole officer says it makes me look bad in front of the judge.