Deicide, a band fronted by Glen Benton that has been pissing off Jesus and the Virgin Mary for several years, has finally released their new music video along with their new and spectacular logo. Since this band is so anti-Christian and therefore terribly terrifying, I’ve decided to post their new logo.
A Few Facts About Deicide:
It’s a little known fact that Glen Benton is so Satanic, he actually had Anton Lavey and the devil himself in the form of an anti-Christian mosquito light their collective cock rings on fire to brand an upside-down cross on his forehead. When asked why he went with an upside-down cross instead of 666, Glen Benton said, “Because 666 is for posers. Besides, Crowley couldn’t make it to the forehead branding.”
Glen Benton is a fat, drunken slob with dorky, yet Satanic, facial hair.
The true meaning of 666 for all the true believers in the know, according to Benton, is “69ing with Satan, which makes Satanic sense because the Devil is a double inverted dyslexic.”
The stupid but utterly Satanic BMX “armor” Benton used to wear on stage was actually made from Asian Baphomet plastic crystals mined in South Africa. Thusly, it was ultra blasphemous.
Jack Owen kicks ass.
When Deicide played a show in my hometown a few years back, one of the guitar players—who left the band with his brother recently—was wearing a leather S&M mask with the zipper shut. When asked why he wore that mask on stage he replied, “I’m tired of Benton making me lick the ass of a plastic effigy of Satan before every show. This was my protest. You know, like those guys in China who licked tank treads a few years ago.”
When Deicide played in Las Vegas a few years back, Glen Benton told me candidly that “My wiener is the handle and my ass is the slot machine. I hope Satan pulls my handle and hits the jackpot.”
As Glen Benton gets older, he seems to have a larger and larger bald spot. This, he says, is where Satan and Satan’s pope rest their nuts when they give him lyrics for new Deicide songs.
The song “Dead by Dawn” is about Glen Benton’s ill-fated sea monkeys.
There you have it, Deicide’s new logo and a few little-known facts about the band itself. Don’t forget to buy the band’s new CD, The Stench of Redemption, which got its name from the smell of Benton’s unwashed, Satanic leather pants after Deicide’s last tour.
P.S. "Homage for Satan" is improperly titled. It should be "Homage to Satan." This just goes to show that Satan sucks at speaking English. I think he's too used to speaking backwards Latin. I mean, grow the fuck up already, right?