This blogger often does a great job pointing out art that sucks, which is why I’ve decided to mention a piece of art that doesn’t suck. This painting was created by the German painter Cornelius Quabeck. This masterpiece measures 160x100 cm and is coal and cloth paint on coarse cotton. And while it would have been more badass if Cornelius would have painted it with blood, he still gets credit for making a painting of Kerry King that actually looks like Kerry King; none of that postmodern art bullshit.
The painting, simply titled “Kerry,” was displayed at this year’s Art Forum Berlin; some fancy-pants art show that probably sucks. Undoubtedly, “Kerry” was the best thing there. This kick ass painting probably scared a bunch of stupid, pretentious art-snobs so much they dropped their cheese into their wine. Slayer kicks ass.
13 comments:
Holy Shit! That guy is on my hockey team. His real name is Jeff. I knew he played in a band, but famous? Geez Louise!
badgerbob - It's interesting that you know a guy named Jeff who looks like Kerry King, because the other guitar player in Slayer is Jeff Hanneman...Maybe on off days they switch names to confuse their insane, drug addled fans.
See if you can get Kerry King - or Jeff as you know him - to give me an autograph. Last time I met him, he signed the autograph to "Sordid Cantaloupe" instead of Morbid Misanthrope.
I play on sunday night, and will check it out.
badgerbob - Slayer is cool.
dude, that's awesome
i recently went to a Picasso exhibit - most of it was boring as all hell, but there were a few that were intriguing
he did a lot of like etchings, or pencil drawings or something
basically black marks on beige paper and most of them were very dark and interesting
anyway, he used a Minataur in a lot of them - pretty cool
j holden - Minotaurs kick ass.
I will admit that some of Picasso's stuff is interesting. Hell, I like "Guernica" simply because it was mentioned on the cartoon "The Critic."
Mainly I prefer older art, from back when artists had skill. I like Rembrandt and Jan Van Eyck (especially Van Eyck's "The Arnolfini Marriage"). I have seen some of Renoir's work in person, and while it was a little sissy for me, it was still kind of cool.
However, I loathe most postmodern art (excluding photorealism, especially Chuck Close). "Look at me. I'm a douche bag who filled a room in New York with dirt. I'm an artist." And I'm still bitter about being forced to study "cunt art" in college.
morbid - yes, Minotaurs DO kick ass
and yea - actually quite a lot of the Picasso stuff was pretty cool
but i agree, sooo many "artists" just like put blobs of paint on a canvas and they're "brilliant"
um, yea
j holden - I'm way more of a drunk than that dick Jackson Pollock. Why the hell am I not famous?
rude - It's the damndest thing: you'd think I would have gotten some publicity when I killed Pope John Paul II, but no, natural causes offed him. Infallible my ass!
I've punched a bunch of famous people. Everyone from David Hasselhoff to the singer from Korn, but it never does me any good. I bet if I punched Madonna I'd get on the news. Without her two front teeth she'd have no gap and therefore, no magical powers.
hulabelly - I don't really want to be famous so much as I want to be rich. My bar tab is getting quite high - astronomical even - and I probably need to get rich to pay it off.
"The Arnolfini Marriage" is a fine, clever piece of art that helped me get through my modern and postmodern art classes. While the feminist bitch of a teacher was showing the class slides of trashcans full of used tampons and calling it art, I was looking at "The Arnolfini Marriage" in my three-thousand page art book to remind me what real art is. One day I will punch Judy Chicago.
And what the fuck is up with "found art?" Jasper Johns is a dick. Goddamnit I hate modern and postmodern art! Excluding photorealism, of course.
willow - Yeah, John Kerry ruined it for everyone. What a butt munch. But Kerry King is sweet.
If you need some blood for your artwork, let me know. My blood is cheap...and flammable. I even have some blood art I could sell you to pass off as your own. Lipstick, however, I can't help you with. The only lipstick I have is on my knuckles from when I punched that hooker.
hulabelly - Egyptian art does kick ass. Especially all the art that proves Egypt was founded by survivors that escaped the great cataclysm that destroyed Atlantis. What do you mean "they've never found any definitive proof"? Sure they have; it's just in code. You have to be a bit loopy to understand it.
This is very interesting site... » » »
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